Hi, I’m Kelly and welcome to the Raising Love podcast. Raising love within yourself as only you can.

And, for most of us who have struggled with ourselves and our bodies for much of our life, what you probably believe wholeheartedly as being the number one issue about yourself; is your weight.

But your weight is only a symptom. A symptom of what is going on inside of you. Inside your mind and inside your body. As diet after diet gave you hope that this one was finally it. As each diet made promises you totally fell for and gave you guarantees your dream body was within reach but only after you consume your weight in cabbage for the entire week.

So gross.

And, what happened at the end of these diets? You were left feeling like a failure so you ran straight back to the fridge. Then you started all over again with the next diet which made you the same empty promises.

And now you are stuck on this out of control rollercoaster with no idea how to get off. You feel sick, you are so exhausted from going around and around and around, and have absa-fucking-lutely had enough. You’re done. The years have worn you down and you can’t take it anymore.

So, who wants off? Don’t you want to wake up in the morning and enjoy who you are? Enjoy what the day may bring, to stop thinking about how horrible your body is and to love every part of yourself again?

How amazing does this sound?

Ok. So now that I have you all excited I am going to give you a bit of painful truth. This whole process is not an easy one. It will be so ridiculously messy once you really get stuck into it but I can promise you this. It is so worth it.

This is a great quote from a book I read recently called the 5 am club. “all change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous at the end”. That really does sum up all change that we go through. Without pain there is no growth. And we are all here to grow and to learn.

And, I can tell you, I had a VERY messy middle. And my middle spread, not only on my body, but throughout my life.

I believed whole-heartedly that I was nothing more than the weight on my body and I lived as though I was nothing else. That everyone around me only saw my big, fat, ugly body.

Which led me to eating more, feeling even more depressed and going around and around in circles until I spun out of control. I didn’t know how to stop eating and I didn’t know how to love who I was.

Not until I got skinny, anyway. That really was the only way I was ever going to love myself.

All I had to do was stop eating, work out constantly, do lots of cardio, become a runner, burn a gazillion calories and look like the supermodels of the 90’s. Waif thin and beautiful.

Deep down I knew this was not the way to go about losing weight but I certainly tried many, many diets with either a little bit of success for a while or no success at all.

And, of course, it was my fault because I was fat and stupid and had absolutely no will power to keep food out of my mouth for more than an hour. Nor did I want to drag my huge body to a gym where everyone would look at me and laugh. Judging me for being a fat, pig who couldn’t control herself enough to get skinny and beautiful.

See, that’s what the mindset of most men and women were back then, when I was a teenager and in my early 20’s. The 80’s, 90’s and 2000’s.

I think that mindset is shifting thanks to many amazing women showing everyone that it is ok to love yourself as you are, whatever your body size, whatever your hair colour or eye colour or skin colour.

I spent so much of my life, every waking moment to be honest, thinking about my weight. Hating myself and my body. Wishing it would magically get skinny without me ever having to do anything, wanting to be someone else. Mimicking others because I believed everything about me was wrong.

I remember visiting my aunt and uncle and cousins one summer and they took me to the beach. I used to love going to the beach but once my body felt more like a whale than a beautiful, sleek dolphin I dreaded going.

I vividly remember a woman who was of a larger size walking along the beach not far from where we were sitting and my aunty commented to my older cousin (a woman) on her size and about her legs being so big that her legs were rubbing together.

Can you imagine how I felt, as a 16 year old girl, listening to that? A 16 year old girl who had her own weight problems.

I was horrified that they would even make a nasty comment about another woman, especially because they are Christians. How could a woman speak about another woman like that? About her body and be so cruel?

I encountered this many times in my life as an overweight woman.

But those comments were directed at me.

If I was walking down the street, minding my own business, men would yell hurtful comments out of their car at me.

I would be ignored because I was the “fat girl”, while the skinny beautiful women I was with would get all the attention.

This went on and on for years. And every comment, every disgusted look, every time I was ignored; all of this settled inside me like a concrete balloon. Heavily floating around my body, preventing me from living my most beautiful life. Causing me to believe I was nothing more than my weight. That I would never be anything more than what my body looked like.

Which is why I want YOU to now, today, begin thinking differently about your weight.

In the last episode I talked about how you’re so much more than your body. So, these two episodes go hand-in-hand because, obviously, your weight is your body.

But your weight is NOT what your body needs you to focus on.

That number on the scale which tells you how much you weigh, is only a number. But that number can cause you to stop eating, to throw up, to binge eat, to hate yourself, to feel angry and frustrated, to cry, to scream, to have a breakdown.

All because of a fucking number.

If it is even a hundred grams different to where you believe it must be, it can ruin your whole day, your whole week, your whole LIFE.

Nothing can break you more than seeing a number that isn’t right.

When did the scale become such a judgment on who you are as a person?

It’s time to throw away your scale and LOVE your body again. As it is right now.

Because who you are when you step on that scale is not who you truly are as a woman.

Your life as a woman belongs to the soul living inside of you. It does not belong to anyone else or anything else.

Especially your weight.

I see way too many women stopping themselves because of their bodies and their weight.

I know I did.

When I was 18, a friend of mine set me up on a blind date with a man who was a couple of years older than me.

He picked me up and we went into the city. Now, by this stage I was very overweight, I completely hated who I was and I totally believed no one gave a shit about what I had to say so I stayed quiet most of the time.

We went for dinner, which I don’t really remember, but the most significant part of this evening was him going on roller coaster all by himself because I was too scared.

Not scared of going on the roller coaster but scared of how my weight might affect me fitting into the roller coaster. It was only one of those carny rollercoasters that weren’t very big.

My weight held me back from having a fun time with this really lovely guy. I didn’t even TRY.

My weight held me back from having any fun. Ever. Well, mostly.

I BELIEVE my weight held me back from ever doing anything but when I think about it I moved to America whilst I was huge. I then moved to England, a little bit lighter but still pretty big in my body.

I want you to think back on your life where your weight held you back? And where it wasn’t even a consideration. Where you did something anyway?

See, deep inside you are a WHOLE set of beliefs that have become your reality. And if you believe you are fat and that you must constantly be losing weight to enjoy any part of your life, then you won’t enjoy any part of your life. Even in those times when you do allow yourself a little bit of joy, it will still feel too hard and you’ll be constantly thinking about your weight and wondering what everyone is thinking about you.

I want you to think differently about your weight. I want you to release the hold your weight has on you and your life.

From this very moment on YOU get to decide what you want to enjoy.

So, instead of your weight being the main focus, what should you focus on?

Your life is a good start. What do you want it to be? To look like? What do you want to do with it?

What have you always wanted to do but you’ve continually stopped yourself from doing?

How do you want to FEEL?

Do you really want to keep feeling like shit? There has to come a point when you just can’t keep going as you are anymore?

I can honestly tell you that releasing the hold my weight had on me was one of the best things I have ever done.

I not only feel empowered in my decisions now, I also feel a love for myself I have not felt since I was a child.

I understand the importance of living my life without the burden of my weight. Because there is always more of a burden on your life than there is on your body when you allow your weight to hold you back from living your most beautiful life.

The life you are meant to live.

Don’t waste another minute allowing your weight to burden your life.

Throw away your scale. CHOOSE to love your body as it is right now and welcome in a life of joy, fun and adventure.

There is a whole world waiting for you to enjoy it.

Get out there now and enjoy.

Thank you so much for listening, beautiful. This really is a dream come true for me.

I spent so much of my life being quiet, not speaking up, staying small that I forgot I have a voice worth listening to.

You may not always agree with what I say and that’s ok.

This is a conversation between us. Yes, I have lots to say but I also want to hear what you have to say.

So, leave me a comment, email me your thoughts, get in touch and let me know what conversations you’d like to have.

But before you go, I have a gift for you. I created 5 steps to loving your body AND creating your ideal weight naturally just for you, Beautiful.

To receive my gift, please pop on over to the home page of my website lovebody.com.au, leave your details and this awesome book will arrive in your inbox ASAP.

Inside you’ll find 5 steps to help you raise love in your whole body and your mind. You deserve to feel amazing and this simple, yet effective, guide will do just that. With nutrition, movement, your LOVE story, the when effect and forgiveness all supporting you as you begin to raise love within yourself again.

If you loved this episode, please share it with your friends and family.

Please remember, it’s time to start cultivating, nurturing and raising love within yourself.
Because, you are a smart, amazing, beautiful woman with so much to offer this world.

Continue raising love. Speak soon.